It starts with so much excitement. Your kid begs for a guitar, carries it everywhere and plays their first three chords to anyone who’ll listen. Then, somewhere between months two and four, things change. The guitar stays in its case, “I’ll practice later” becomes the standard reply, and you find yourself fighting a daily battle over ten minutes of practice.
This is normal – almost everyone who learns an instrument goes through it, and you can get past it without nagging, bribing or giving up. Here’s what we’ve seen work in our music lessons for kids and teens in North Tel Aviv – from Neve Avivim to Tel Baruch – lesson after lesson.
Why motivation dips after 2–4 months
Early progress is fast – from nothing to a simple song is a huge leap. A few months in, several things happen at once:
- The novelty wears off. The instrument now competes with screens, friends and other activities.
- Progress slows down. The next stage needs harder skills – smooth chord changes, two-hand coordination on piano, hand-foot independence on drums. A week of practice suddenly doesn’t show.
- A gap opens between what they hear in their head and what comes out. Their hands can’t yet play the song they love – frustrating, especially for kids used to picking things up quickly.
A dip at this point isn’t a sign that music “isn’t for them” – it’s a sign that it’s time to change the approach.
Intrinsic vs extrinsic motivation
Psychologists distinguish intrinsic motivation – doing something because it’s enjoyable or meaningful – from extrinsic motivation – doing it for a reward or to avoid a consequence. Self-Determination Theory, developed by researchers Edward Deci and Richard Ryan, points to three needs that fuel intrinsic motivation:
- Autonomy – feeling that I have a choice and some control.
- Competence – feeling that I’m succeeding and getting better.
- Relatedness – feeling connected to other people through the activity.
Research has also found that tangible rewards promised in advance for an already enjoyable activity can sometimes undermine enjoyment of it – the overjustification effect. “Fifteen more minutes and you get an hour on the iPad” might work for a week, but it teaches your child that practice is the price of the real fun.
Rewards aren’t off-limits – a sticker chart for a seven-year-old or a pizza night after a concert is fine. Let them celebrate achievements rather than pay for minutes.
Repertoire: play what your child actually loves
The most powerful fuel for a young musician is a song they really want to play. A kid who loves Imagine Dragons will practice “Believer” far more willingly than a method-book exercise.
- Let your child choose at least one song each term. Even if it’s “too hard”, a good teacher can simplify it – the opening riff, just the chorus, or, in guitar lessons for kids, a version with basic chords.
- Build technique into songs. Instead of “C major scale ten times”, find a song that uses it. A kid in drum lessons for kids who drums along to The White Stripes’ “Seven Nation Army” drills a basic rock beat without noticing.
- Don’t look down on their taste. A viral TikTok song is a legitimate way in. From there you can reach The Beatles, Led Zeppelin or Queen – but only if your kid is still in the room.
Short goals and small wins
“Becoming a good musician” is too abstract. Kids need progress they can see in weeks:
- One goal – specific and measurable. Not “practice the song”, but “play the chorus start to finish without stopping at 70 BPM”.
- Metronome steps. Start at a tempo they can play cleanly – say 60 BPM – and go up 4–5 BPM only after three clean run-throughs in a row. Write the tempo on a sticky note by the instrument: watching it climb from 60 to 80 is a tangible win.
- Before-and-after recordings. Record on your phone at the start and end of the week. Comparing two 30-second clips beats any compliment.
- A mini “release party”. When the song is ready, play it for grandparents on a video call or for the family after Friday-night dinner.
Younger kids do better with short practice blocks – for a ready-made structure, see our 20-minute daily practice routine.
The practice environment: get the instrument out of the case
One of the simplest, most effective changes: take the instrument out of its case. Guitar on a stand in the living room, keyboard plugged in, a practice pad by the sofa. When every session starts with unzipping, hunting for a cable and tuning, practice feels like effort. When the instrument is right there, kids pick it up for five minutes “just because” – and those minutes add up.
- A fixed, comfortable spot – the right chair, good light, the music already open.
- Tuned in advance – a clip-on tuner left on the guitar headstock saves a lot of frustration.
- A regular time – tie practice to a daily anchor: after lunch, between after-school activities, or before the evening shower. Habits come from repetition, not willpower.
- For drummers – a practice pad, and headphones for an electronic kit, solve most arguments with the neighbours.
How to talk about practice (and how not to)
How you talk about music at home matters as much as the teacher:
| Instead of | Try | Why |
|---|---|---|
| “Have you practiced yet?” | “What did you learn in your lesson? Show me?” | Curiosity, not checking up – your child feels like the expert, not the suspect. |
| “You’re so talented!” | “That chord change sounds much smoother than last week” | Praising specific progress teaches that practice is what makes you better. |
| “We’re paying for these lessons, so practice” | “What would help you practice this week?” | Guilt doesn’t build enjoyment. An open question gives them ownership. |
| “Half an hour, and I’m timing you” | “Let’s set a goal – play the verse twice without stopping” | A goal, not a clock, teaches focused practice. |
| “That doesn’t sound right” | Supportive silence, or “Which part is the hardest?” | Technical corrections are the teacher’s job. You’re the supportive audience. |
One more tip: ask your child to teach you. Showing Dad how to hold drumsticks or where middle C is reinforces what they’ve learned – and builds real pride.
Age-by-age tips
| Age | What’s typical | Suggested practice | What works |
|---|---|---|---|
| 6–8 | Short attention span, needs adult involvement and play | 10–15 minutes a day, can be split in two | A parent in the room, games (“play it 5 times and move your teddy one step”), sticker charts, familiar songs from films and children’s music. |
| 9–12 | Wants to succeed and show off, starting to form their own taste | 15–25 minutes a day | Choosing songs, weekly goals with a metronome, recordings, mini-performances for family, joining a first ensemble. |
| 13–18 | Identity, friends and independence come first | 20–45 minutes a day, depending on ambitions | Full ownership of repertoire, a band with friends, songwriting, recording and posting online, a teacher who’s a role model rather than “another adult telling me what to do”. |
With teens, the more you step in, the more music becomes “my parents’ thing”. Give them ownership – and drive them to rehearsals.
Ensembles and recitals: the power of playing with others
If one thing brings kids back to music after a slump, it’s playing with other kids. A band ticks all three boxes: relatedness (“my band”), competence (my part matters) and autonomy (we choose songs together). And when your bandmates are counting on you, you practice – for them, not for Mum.
Recitals and end-of-year concerts give a real deadline, and even one song in front of parents is something kids remember for years. Choose a piece your child has mastered, so it’s about success rather than stress. See also our guide on how to prepare for a live performance.
When a break – or a new instrument or teacher – is the right call
Not every dip needs pushing through. Signs to take stock:
- The struggle has lasted months, not just a couple of weeks, despite changes to repertoire and routine.
- Your child talks about anxiety or cries around lessons – not just “it’s boring”.
- They’re clearly drawn to another instrument – drumming on every table while learning piano, or singing all day while learning drums.
- There’s no chemistry with the teacher. It happens, and it’s nobody’s failure. A teacher with a different style – more rock, more playful, more challenging – can change everything, and at a school offering lessons across many instruments and styles you can switch teacher or instrument without starting from scratch.
Before quitting, consider a planned break with a return date (say, a month over the summer), or a different format – an ensemble instead of one-to-one, or lessons at home. If you’re weighing a new instrument, our guide to choosing a first instrument for your child can help you think it through again.
And a child who stops hasn’t “wasted” the years: rhythm, a trained ear and learning habits stay, and many return to playing later.
Common mistakes parents make
- Using practice as punishment – the fastest way to make a child hate the instrument.
- Comparing – to a sibling, a cousin, or the kid in class who’s already playing Für Elise. Every child progresses at their own pace.
- Measuring only time – 30 minutes of aimless noodling is worth less than 10 focused minutes with a clear goal.
- Giving up right at the low point – quitting in month three, just before the skills start to click.
- Running the lesson from the sidelines – correcting technique, picking their songs, or arguing with the teacher in front of them.
- Not talking to the teacher – they can only adjust goals if they know what’s happening at home. A quick “Tough week, he didn’t touch the guitar” message is gold.
How we approach it at Rockstar in North Tel Aviv
At Rockstar our teachers are working musicians, and in our kids’ music lessons in Ramat Aviv we build each plan around the songs they love, reaching technique, rhythm and reading from there. When ready, students join ensembles and play at our end-of-year shows, and we keep in touch with parents to spot a motivation dip early and change direction in time. Our music school is in Ramat Aviv Gimel, a short drive from Neve Avivim, Kiryat Sharet and Neve Gan. If it suits your family better, Rockstar Home brings lessons to your home in North Tel Aviv, subject to teacher availability.
FAQ
How long should my child practice each day?
For ages 6–8, 10–15 minutes a day, five days a week, is plenty; at 9–12, 15–25 minutes; ambitious teens will do more. Consistency beats length: 15 minutes daily is better than 90 minutes once a week.
Should I reward my child for practicing?
You can, especially with younger kids – stickers, a progress chart, a small celebration for a finished song. Reward achievements rather than minutes, and don’t tie practice to screen time. Over time, enjoyment should replace the reward.
My child wants to quit after three months. Should I insist?
Three months is exactly when most kids hit a low point. First change something – a song they choose, a short goal, an ensemble, a chat with the teacher – then agree on a trial period – “Two more months with these changes, then we decide together.” If deep reluctance remains, explore a different instrument or format.
Should I sit with my child while they practice?
For ages 6–8, yes – at least part of the time; it turns practice into time together. From around 10, move towards independence: be the audience, not the supervisor. With teenagers, only when invited.
When is my child ready to play in a band?
When they can play a few simple songs start to finish at a steady tempo – for most kids, after a few months to a year of lessons. Their teacher will know, and a band often brings the excitement back.
Where can I find music lessons for kids in North Tel Aviv – including Tel Baruch and Neve Gan?
Rockstar offers two options: our music school in Ramat Aviv Gimel, which kids reach from Tel Baruch, North Tel Baruch, Neve Gan, Kiryat Sharet and Neve Avivim (and from nearby Ramat HaSharon), or lessons at home through Rockstar Home, subject to teacher availability in your area. More in our guide to music lessons in Ramat Aviv. Either way, you start with an intro lesson.
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Read also: A 20-Minute Daily Practice Routine
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